


Get Backers' Truth or Dare

by YumeArashi



Category: Get Backers
Genre: Bondage, Chibi, Crack, Embarrassment, Explicit Language, F/M, Humor, M/M, Mistaken for Being in a Relationship, Need Brain Bleach, Out of Character, Protectiveness, Puppy Love, Truth or Dare, Voyeurism, Whipping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-19
Updated: 2013-01-19
Packaged: 2017-11-26 01:26:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/645006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YumeArashi/pseuds/YumeArashi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Exactly what the title says.  Check the tags, or only for a laugh : )</p>
            </blockquote>





	Get Backers' Truth or Dare

“So, who invited him, anyway?”  Ban glared at Akabane.  Chibi Ginji peered timidly out from behind his back.

Akabane merely smirked.  “Oh, I heard about your gathering and couldn’t resist making an appearance.  It sounded like such delightful fun.”

Chibi Ginji whimpered.  “Scary...”

“Ah, quit whining, snake bastard.”  Shido rolled his eyes.  “He’s here, just deal.”

“Surely we can all conduct ourselves civilly for the space of one evening.”  As usual, Kazuki was attempting to make peace.

“But of course, I wouldn’t dream of doing anything...untoward.”  Akabane said smoothly.

“If you’re gonna stay, you’re gonna play by the rules.”  Himiko said.

“Naturally.” Akabane said breezily.

“So, who’s going first?”  Hevn asked.

“Me!  Me!”  Emishi waved his hand energetically.

“Ok, who else thinks that a bad idea?” Ban muttered.

“Do I really have to play?”  Makube X looked dismayed.

“If I have to play, and my sister has to play, then you have to play.”  Jubei stated flatly.

Makube X sighed.

“So what do I do?” Emishi asked.

Hevn sighed, dismayed to be in a group of such uneducated people. “You pick someone in the room and asked them if they want a truth or dare. If they say truth, you can ask them any question you want and they have to answer. If they say dare, you can dare them to do something.”

“O-Kay!” Emishi said. “But truth is boring! Who wants a dare!”

Everyone glanced at each other.

“Come ooooonnnnnn,” Emishi whined.

“Shido’ll do it.”  Ban grinned at his rival retrieval specialist.

“Get real, snake bastard.”

“What’s wrong, monkey tamer?  Chicken?”

“Fuck you, you cold-blooded bastard.  Emishi, gimme your goddamned dare.”

“All right!”  Emishi’s grin could only be described as evil.  “Let’s see . . . hm . . . do a beast transformation for us and turn into a chicken!”

“A chicken?” Shido asked, glaring at him.

“Yeah! A chicken!”

“For four turns.” Ban added.

“YOU CAN’T ADD TO THE DARE!” Shido snarled, looking momentarily more like a tiger than the prescribed chicken.

“Nonononono! I like that!” Emishi cheered. “For four turns.”

“Five if you keep whining.” Ban said dryly.

“Ban, stop helping.” Kazuki ordered.

“Can’t I take truth?” Shido asked plaintively.

“Nope, too late!” Hevn chirped.  “But take your turn first.  You can’t ask someone for truth or dare if you’re a chicken.”

“I hate you all.”  With that final growl, Shido glared around the room. “Snake Bastard, truth or dare?”

“Truth,” Ban said immediately.

“Yeah?” Shido said, raising an eyebrow at him. “Are you going to be the chicken now?”

“Ha ha,” Ban muttered. “You can’t fool me, monkey trainer. I said truth and I’m sticking with it.”

Shido made an irritated noise, then paused for thought. “So. I heard about this incident with a job at the hot springs.”

Ban’s eye twitched. “What about it?...”

“You were kinda banged up for a while afterwards.” Shido drawled. “I heard you got beaten up by a bunch of tiny, insignificant, helpless monkeys. That can’t possibly be true, now, can it?”

“NO,” Ban said, eye twitching again.

“Oh no?” Shido asked with an innocent smile. “It’s not?”

“NO!”

“It really isn’t!” Ginji said, coming to his partner’s defense. “They weren’t tiny, insignificant, or helpless at all! They were violent and scary and . . . and they knew karate! It really wasn’t Ban-chan’s fault that they kicked the stuffing out of him after all . . .”

Ban twitched. Again. “Ginji, stop helping me,” he snarled.

“This is very interesting,” Akabane said, sounding amused. “Maybe fighting you won’t be as interesting as I supposed it would be, Ban-kun . . .”

“You’re not supposed to lie.” Sakura pointed out.

“I wasn’t lying.” Ban said, clearly pained. “I was simply not going to elaborate.” He rubbed a hand through his spiky hair, glaring at Shido. “You’re all done. Start clucking.”

Shido smiled smugly. “Glad to.” 

“Ban-chan, now it’s your turn!”  Ginji smiled.

“Good.  Now, I have to wonder just how the monkey tamer knew about that little incident...Kazuki?”

“Yes?”  Kazuki replied cheerfully.

“You wouldn’t happen to have any ideas about how Shido knew all about that, would you?”

Kazuki smiled serenely.  “This is Truth or Dare.  If you want to know, you’ll have to ask me for a truth.”

Ban growled.  “Then fucking truth or dare, string roller.”

“Truth, of course.”

In the background, Makube X could be heard protesting, “Shido, there are no worms in the carpet!” as Shido wandered around the room scratching for worms. “At least go in the yard if you want a snack...”

Ban’s smile grew calculating.  “So, everybody knows that you and Jubei are sleeping together...”

Kazuki’s expression did not change, but the rest of the room erupted into chaos.  Jubei choked, and Sakura shrieked, “Jubei!  You’re sleeping with Kazuki-kun?” 

Ginji sputtered “B-b-b-b-ban-chaaaaaaaaan!”

Emishi, meanwhile, was laughing hysterically.

Hevn cackled, dancing in her seat, “Ha!  I knew it!  Now Paul and Natusmi each owe me five hundred yen!”

Makube X was whimpering under his chair, repeating a mantra of, “didn’t need to know that, didn’t need to know that.”

Himiko groaned, “Oh, god, now I’m getting these images I so didn’t need.”

“Images indeed.” Akabane said with no inflection whatsoever.

The horrified silence that followed that statement was broken only by the sound of Shido’s soft clucking.

“Having established this firmly,” Ban went on after clearing his throat. “And having witnessed firsthand the amazing potential of your strings, I wonder, are you equally skilled at using them when you and Jubei are alone together for the evening in an intimate setting?”

Kazuki was silent for a minute, his brow furrowed as he desperately tried to find a loophole in that question. “I suppose that certain aspects of my talents are...useful in more than strictly combative situations.” Kazuki said.

“That’s not answering the question, Kazuki.” Ban said in a sing song voice.

“Yes.” Kazuki admitted.

“What was that now?”

“YES!!!!” Kazuki yelled.

“Images,” Himiko moaned, burying her face in her palms. “Oh, God, I’m going to be traumatized for life . . .”

“Oh, come on,” Hevn said, clearly amused. “Don’t tell me that you don’t enjoy the image of those two in -- ”

“Hevn-san,” Jubei said calmly, “if you attempt to finish that sentence, I’d like you to keep in mind that with one needle, I could effectively keep you from speaking for the rest of your life.”

Hevn just smiled at him. “Hai, hai, Jubei-kun.”

“It’s your turn, Kazuki,” Ban said, sounding smug, having now effectively gotten revenge for Kazuki having told Shido about their adventures.

Kazuki’s eyes narrowed. He looked around the room, apparently trying to decide who would be best to take out his ire on. His gaze landed on Hevn, still silently chortling. “Hevn-san, would you like a truth or a dare?”

“Hm . . . truth,” Hevn said. “There is no question you can ask me that I’m ashamed of.”

“In that case . . .” Kazuki smiled wickedly. “If you find the image of Jubei and myself so . . . interesting . . . exactly how many times have you attempted to walk in our friends Ban and Ginji in similarly . . . compromising positions?”

Hevn turned an interesting shade of stop sign red.

Ginji rechibified with a squeak. “Hevn-san...!!!!”

Ban’s mouth twisted into a half scowl. “I,” he announced imperiously, “am not amused.”

“Oh, but the rest of us are.” Jubei said dispassionately.

“I, um...well...” Hevn rubbed a hand against her cheek, laughing a little self-consciously. “Well...you know...jobs occasionally come up at the oddest times...” she trailed off.

“We’re all listening with great interest, Hevn-san.” Kazuki prompted, clearly relishing the situation.

“Umm....ummm...”

“Don’t tell me you carry that camera because you like to take pictures of the city,” Kazuki scolded.

“CAMERA!!!!!” Ban and Chibi-Ginji yelled in unison.

“Well...what if I don’t actually know the answer?”

“Does that mean you’ve lost count?”  Ban growled.

Kazuki looked unsympathetic.  ‘Take your best guess, then.”

“Um...I’d have to say...well....maybe..... two.”

“Two?” Ginji looked relieved.

“Dozen?” Emishi asked brightly.

“Hundred.”

“Really?” Himiko stopped looking horrified and started looking impressed. “So if you’ve known them for two years, that means you’ve tried . . . every third day, more or less.”

“How many times have you succeeded?” Ban asked, eyes narrowed.

“My turn’s over!” Hevn chirped. “Hm . . . Makube X, you’ve been awfully small and quiet over underneath that chair for a while. I think it’s time that you had a turn.”

Makube X let out another little whimper. “You know, I rivaled the God of Mugenjou.... why do I have to play this stupid child’s game?”

“Because we said so,” Hevn said imperiously. “Truth or dare?”

Makube X sighed. For a few moments, he debated the relative merits of answering one of Hevn’s embarrassing questions, versus having to perform one of Hevn’s embarrassing dares. “Truth,” he finally said. Hevn smiled brilliantly. “No, dare.”

Hevn smiled even more brilliantly.  “All right!  I have to say, the relationship between you and Sakura is really sweet.  Just adorable.  So, go up and give her a nice big kiss.”

“What?”  Makube X squeaked in a thoroughly undignified manner.  Sakura turned bright red.

Jubei scowled.  “You will not touch my honorable sister.”

“I don’t want to touch your honorable sister!”  Makube X protested.  Sakura frowned, and Makube X hastened to add, “Not that I mean that in a bad way, I mean, not like I don’t want to touch you at all, or anything, it’s just that, you know...”

Ginji interrupted kindly.  “Makube X, you might want to stop talking.”

Makube X fell silent with a whimper.

“Come on,” Hevn ordered. “And make it a good one.”

“Can I change my mind?” Makube X asked.

“No,” Hevn said, with a sweet smile.

Makube X gave Jubei a nervous look, then crept closer to Sakura. “Uhm . . . ah . . .” He frowned. “Wait a minute. I’m the smart one here,” he declared. He grabbed Sakura’s hand and placed a firm kiss on the back of it. “There, I’m done,” he said, and looked smug.

“No!” Hevn said. “It has to be on the lips!”

“But Hevn-san, you never specified,” Ginji said, blinking at her.

“I said he had to make it a good one! That means it has to be on the lips!”

“Technically,” Makube X said, now looking a lot more pleased with himself, “I can define a good kiss on my own, thanks. And that was just fine.” He looked anxiously at Sakura. “That was fine, right?”

“Well...”Sakura looked guiltily at her brother. “Actually...I wouldn’t define it as a good kiss...I think I agree a good kiss is a kiss on the lips...”

Jubei choked, and Makube X’s blue eyes went huge. “Ummm....Ahhh...” Makube X gave Jubei a ‘please don’t kill me’ look.

Emishi grabbed Jubei’s shoulder. “Down, boy.”

Jubei subsided sullenly.

“Sooooo,” Hevn trilled, “by Sakura-chan’s standards, you have to try again.”

Makube X gave Jubei another nervous look. “Okay,” he said nervously. He reminded himself firmly that if Sakura wanted a kiss, she was going to get a kiss. He went forward again and did his best to deliver the kiss that was promised. When he pulled away, he was blushing a deep red. “So... was that.... better?”

“It was just fine,” Sakura assured him, smiling beatifically.

Looking dazed and pleased, Makube X settled back into his seat.

“I’m going to destroy you,” Jubei growled.

Makube X blinked at him hazily. “Huh?” he asked.

“DESTROY.”

“Down, boy!   Don’t make us sic Kazuki and his strings on you.”  Emishi smirked.

“I’d like to see that.”  Ban smirked.

“Yet more images...”  Akabane repeated.

“Please stop saying that...” Ginji whimpered.

“Just be glad he’s not picturing us,” Ban said.

Ginji fell over.

“What makes you so sure I’m not?” Akabane asked.

“Ginji.” Kazuki walked over, thumping Ginji on the back. “You need oxygen to survive. Please breathe.”

“It was purely an academic question, I assure you.” Akabane said reassuringly.

Ginji inhaled noisily. “Thank goodness.”

“Well. More or less.” Akabane added, smiling cheerfully.

Ginji looked at Ban with large eyes. “Save me?” he squeaked.

“Don’t give him more fodder for his imagination.” Ban said, glaring at Akabane, who beamed sunnily back at him.

“Akabane-san!” Makube X declared suddenly, with much more cheer than the situation really warranted. “Truth or dare?”

“My, my . . .” Akabane appeared deep in thought. “If I were to say ‘truth’, surely you would ask what images I have been imagining . . . so I think to be on the safe side, I must request a dare.”

“Dare it is, then!” Makube X said. “Kiss Hevn!”

Akabane was contemplative. “Very well.” He said with a slight shrug. He took his hat off. “Hold my hat.” he said, handing it to Makube X.

Makube X put it on and grinned at Hevn, who gave him a pained, petrified look.

“I suppose I have to make this a proper kiss by your standards too.” Akabane said seriously, looking at Hevn.

Hevn turned as white as a sheet. “Um...ahhhhh....that’s not strictly necessary...”

“Now, Hevn-san, you were quite stringent about what a proper kiss entails.” Makube X pointed out.

“Hevn-san, please stand up.” Akabane said, rising to his feet.

“I can’t.” Hevn said sheepishly.

“Weak in the knees already?” Ban asked ruthlessly, snickering.

Hevn jumped to her feet. “Hardly.” she snapped, jumping in startlement as Akabane tapped on her shoulder, smiling pleasantly.

Before Hevn could bolt away, Akabane dipped her back and gave her a dramatic, cinema-worthy kiss.

They straightened up quite a few long moments later.

“Well,” Hevn said, trying to look dignified. “That was surprisingly not as bad as I thought it would be.”

There was a collective sweatdrop.

Hevn sat down, primly straightening herself.

“Can I keep the hat for now?” Makube X asked.

“Surely,” Akabane said. “Now, as I believe it is my turn... Ginji-kun....”

Ginji tarefied and scrambled for the door. Needless to say, he found Akabane standing in front of him before he could reach it.

“Let’s not be running away,” Akabane said, with a winning smile. “Would you like truth or dare?”

“T-Truth,” Ginji managed, taking a few steps backwards until he was mostly behind Ban.

“So, then...”

Ginji paled.

“Tell me, Ginji-kun...”

Ginji whimpered.

“...Do you like roses?”

Ginji fell on his face.  “Roses?”

“Hai.”

“Um...I guess so...”

Akabane settled back. “That’s all I wanted to know.”

Everyone blinked at him. “That’s all?” Ginji finally ventured nervously. “I don’t have to say anything else?”

“No, that’s all,” Akabane said.

“Okay...” Ginji smiled happily while everyone stared at him and wondered why Ginji got all the luck. “I pick Ban-chan!”

“Of course,” Shido said, glaring at them. “How long have I been a chicken and no one’s told me?”

“Four turns,” Ban said complacently. He ignored the skeptical look Shido gave him, and looked at Ginji. “Dare. There’s nothing the invincible Ban-sama can’t do!”

Ginji grinned. “Okay!” He leaned over and whispered something in Ban’s ear.

Ban smirked. “That’s a dare I’d be happy to carry out tonight.”

Ginji sat back and looked smug. “We’re done,” he said, ignoring the looks everyone was giving him.

“But you have to do the dare in front of everyone!” Hevn protested.

“Yeah, guys,” Emishi said. “We have to know what it is and verify that it was done!”

Ban and Ginji looked at each other.

“Uh oh,” Ginji said, and sweatdropped.

Ban’s brow furrowed. “I’m not sure we can do it here.” he said frankly. “He’ll have to pick something else.”

“NO FAIR!” half the room chorused.

Ban closed his eyes and groaned. “Seriously. Where are we going to find -- ”

“Let them change it, pleeeeease,” Makube X said. “I’ve been traumatized enough for one night....”

“No, no, no,” Kazuki said. “I’m anxious to see this...”

“K-K-kazu-chan....” Ginji said, looking at him wide-eyed.

“Besides,” Ban interrupted, “isn’t it illegal?”

Everyone fell out of their chairs. Except Akabane.

“My, my,” he said. “This does sound interesting.”

Ginji considered. “It’s not illegal to dream, is it Ban-chan?” he said significantly.

Ban looked at him blankly for a moment, then smiled. “Ah.”

                       

            ********

“Any...second...now...” Ban said, staring at his watch.

“THAT WAS SO DISTURBING!!!” Makube X yelped, nearly falling out of his chair. “I TOTALLY DID NOT NEED TO BE SEEING THAT!!!”

Himiko was quietly whimpering.

So was Hevn. However, her whimpers closely resembled the words, “if only one could take pictures in the Jagan...”

Ginji just blushed, terribly embarrassed. Ban just looked smug.

Akabane shook his head. “Oh my, Ginji-kun,” he said, “are you that flexible in reality?”

“What’s more, are you two actually planning on doing that tonight?” Jubei asked skeptically.

“If we do,” Ban said, giving Hevn a dark look, “the doors will be locked and the shades pulled down. All the way. Possibly for the rest of our natural born lives.”

Hevn looked skeptical. “In your car?...”

Ban rolled his eyes. “Do you think we can do that in a CAR?”

Hevn thought about it. “Good point. But if you ever decide to try...”

“You’d better not be anywhere in the neighborhood.” Ban said firmly. “Or for that matter, the prefecture.”

Hevn looked disappointed. “A pity.”

“Indeed.” Akabane agreed.

Ginji gave Ban a pleading look. “Did you have to include him?....”

“Well....” Ban said apologetically. “By the strict rules of the game, yeah....”

“You have just enough honesty to be inconvenient, I see.” Akabane noted. “Interesting.”

“I do believe that it is my turn.” Ban said with a cough. “Himiko!”

“Definitely a truth.  You people are sick.”

“Now, I take offense to that.  I haven’t done anything that bad.”

“Yes, you did.  Anyway, what’s your truth?”

“Ok, so I heard a little something about you and Ginji when he was hospitalized and...”

Ban didn’t even get to ask the question before Himiko started yelling.  “Why do people always just assume that’s what going on, they don’t even stop to ask what’s happening and it doesn’t even occur to them that it might be something perfectly innocent, especially when they know perfectly well that the two of you are...”

“Breathe, Himiko-chan,” Ban grinned.

“Don’t you tell me to breathe, you’re just as bad as the rest of them, always just thinking the worst...”

Ten minutes later, Himiko finally ran out of things to say and sat fuming silently.

“Erm...Himiko-san?”  Makube X spoke up.

“What?!”

“You do realize that Ban must have already known the truth of that situation, right?”  He shrank back a little as Himiko turned a dangerous glare on him.  “It’s just that he must have asked Ginji-san about it at the time...”

Himiko went wide-eyed. “Ban! Is that true?!”

“Now, now, Himiko,” Ban said, waving his finger in her face. “It’s your turn, but you can’t pick me, ‘cause I’ve already gone. Take your temper out on somebody else.”

Himiko glared around the room and her eyes landed on Emishi, who was laughing quite loudly at her. “You, with the ugliest sunglasses to ever deface the earth,” she snarled. “Truth or dare.”

“Hey!” Emishi objected. “I’ll have you know that these sunglasses are -- ”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Himiko interrupted. “Truth or dare.”

Emishi scowled. “Dare.”

“Emishi, I’m not sure that was the brightest choice you ever made...” Sakura said cautiously.

“Though it’s too late now for him to do anything about it.” Shido said, pleased.

“Shut up, chicken-boy!” Himiko snapped. “Emishi, let me see your whip.”

Emishi clutched at it protectively. “I’ll have you know that this whip was...”

“I know, I know, woven from the hair of ten thousand dragon virgins on the last full moon when the plum blossoms are blooming and the Emperor of Never Never land is drinking cherry brandy or something like that. Just give me the damn thing.” Himiko grabbed it from Emishi’s fingers.

He yelped. “What are you going to do with it?...”

“Use it as it’s meant to be.” She stood, glaring at Ban.

Ban edged back in his seat. “Himiko-chan...” he said pleadingly. “It’s Emishi’s turn....”

“Right. He gave me the whip. Dare over.” Himiko snapped. She cracked the whip threateningly. Ban considered the situation, then took off running for the door. “COME BACK HERE AND TAKE IT LIKE A MAN, YOU SICK FREAK!” Himiko yelled, chasing after him.

The others watched, surprised, as the sound of Ban’s pleading and Himiko’s screaming faded into the distance. “Ahhhh.” Emishi said, scratching at the back of his head. “It’s my turn...I guess....so it’d be...Jubei!” He exclaimed, regaining his composure.

“Hm?...” Jubei leveled Emishi with a solid glare.

Emishi was not daunted by such things. “Truth or dare?”

“If anyone thinks I’m going to be stupid enough to take a dare -- ”

“Awright, you said dare!” Emishi crowed.

“I said, if anyone thinks I’m stupid -- ”

“So, let’s see,” Emishi cut him off, giggling insanely. “Why don’t you and Kazuki give us a demonstration of those -- ”

“NO.”

Kazuki gave Emishi a look. “You can’t be serious.”

“Well...of course I’m not serious.” Emishi said offhandedly. “But I still intend to make you do it.”

Kazuki sweatdropped. “But the dare involves me unnecessarily!” he protested.

“That didn’t stop Akabane and Hevn.” Ginji pointed out. “Or Sakura and Makube X. Or Himiko and Ban and Emishi’s whip, for that matter...”

Kazuki’s eyes narrowed. “All right,” he said, his tone implying dire things for everyone involved. “To save Jubei, I will give the demonstration of the skills I use.” Moments later, Emishi was safely trussed up and stowed away in a corner. Kazuki sedately took his seat again. “Now that that’s over... I believe it’s your turn, Jubei.”

Jubei gave Kazuki a very thankful look. “Sakura, I believe it’s finally your turn.” Jubei said, smiling at his sister.

“That isn’t fair! You’re only picking her so nobody else will!” Emishi protested, futilely attempting to squirm his way out of his string cocoon.

“Yes. Yes I am, in fact.” Jubei admitted. “Sakura, truth or dare?”

“This is so cute.” Hevn said with a sniff.

“Indeed it is.” Akabane agreed.

“Pleeeeeeeeseee stop agreeing, affirming, and otherwise adding to the emotional context.” Ginji pleaded with watery eyes.

“I’ll take a truth, I think.”

“Oh, don’t be a wimp.  He’s your little brother, he wouldn't dare you to do anything too bad.”  Emishi piped up from his corner.

“Emishi, I’m already going to hurt you later.  Don’t make it worse.”  Jubei stated calmly.  “All right, then, truth it is.  Oneesan...you really...with Makube X....”

Sakura blushed lightly.  “Hai.”

Jubei was silent for a moment.  “I can’t say I understand, but if it makes you happy...”

“WAI!!!”  The serious moment was broken by Ginji enthusiastically glomping the also-blushing Makube X  “Congratulations!!”

“Besides,” Sakura grinned, “He looks good in the hat.”

Akabane cleared his throat.  “So, who would like to play another round?”

Immediately, a resounding chorus of “NO!” came from every throat in the room.


End file.
